14 days into the new year...

14 days.

Two weeks.

It seems like so much longer!

I just made a Sephora purchase using a giftcard. I bought a face primer and an eye primer (it was $5 on sale, Sephora brand).For $50 total.

I've definitely been feeling a mild desire for new products. But it's strange because I definitely do not want to add to my current "stash" if you will. I wish I could alter it. I wish I could swap some products out for others.

But alas, I will have to make do with what I have.

My makeup style has been very low key lately.

And I find myself going light on the base products (foundation, concealer) because I have so little compared to what I'm used to having.

I know I won't run out anytime soon, but there's that little bit of fear.

Money is tight. I'd rather not have to buy anything if I don't need to. But making products last... Stretching their use... That goes completely against the panning I've done in the past.

And those habits are still hard to break!

I've been trying to distract myself by coming up with new YouTube content, but even that can sometimes be a struggle. I don't know where I belong within the "beauty community" world, or if I even belong at all.

Is there room for somebody on a perpetual no buy?

Wanting New Products

Today I've found myself struggling with wanting new products.

Specifically, new base products. I'm sick of my primer. My foundation. My concealer.

But truthfully, I think what I want is better skin. Or to have my skin return to what I usually consider to be its "normal" state.

Lately I've been dealing with acne. Some spots are so aggressive and difficult to cover up even with green corrector, fuller coverage foundation, AND concealer. I'm not accustomed to dealing with this sort of skin issue. My skin has always, more or less, been clear.

My skin also seems to be wrestling with being combination again. I went through a fairly long period of having dry skin, after having classic combo skin (normal with an oily t-zone). And now I'm noticing some oiliness in my t-zone again, and even around my chin where I am dealing with breakouts. But it's inconsistent.

So it's not about wanting the new makeup. It's about my skin.

What's interesting is that I don't find myself drawn to new skincare items. Perhaps because skincare wouldn't camouflage these issues immediately like makeup would.

So what I'm going to do is look at the skincare items I already have and try and find some new combination of products to help my skin woes.

And in the meantime, dig out the concealer and do my best. And try and de-stress as much as possible. I'm sure the amount of stress is tied to my recent accumulation of breakouts.

I'm dealing with my financial issues (the number one reason why new products are a no-no), the holiday season, my upcoming move, issues at work, and family illness. A little bit of everything!

This evening, I'm going to shop my stash and see what I can come up with- and check out my samples too!

Beauty Budget: First Steps

These are the questions I asked myself before starting to create my beauty budget:

>How much do I actually need? What are the things I might need to repurchase and how often? Am I missing anything right now?

MAX PRICE! Not guaranteed price. What will I actually end up spending?  

The numbers in brackets are what I came up with first. Outside of the brackets is the revised number. 

Confession: I Used the Sephora Coupon

Every year, Sephora has offered a coupon around the holiday season.

This year, for those who hold a VIB Rouge status (something I'm hoping to lose this year) it was $25 off a purchase of $75 or more.

I wasn't going to use it.

But then- I ran out of my MAC Strobe Cream.

Something I hadn't factored into my budget. Something I didn't realize I would be so desperate to have on hand.

And, as it turns out, Sephora does carry some MAC products including the classic Pink Lite Strobe Cream.

So I added it to my cart.

HOWEVER. That product retails for $40CAD. A bit away from that $75 mark.

So I added the conditioner from OLAPLEX. Something on my wishlist. Something I've been hoping to try to see if it would improve my hair.

That brought my total to $78 CAD. With $25 off it's still $53. Add tax at $7.95 and we're at $60.95.

So I used a gift card.

I had been sitting on a ($50) gift card for a while and now was the time. I might regret this at some point during my journey.

But that brought my total down to $10.95. $3 without the tax. But I'm going to include it with tax for the sake of my budget.

I'm working with a budget of approximately $50 a month or $600 for the year.

I am going to go from December 2019 to December 2020 for my yearly budget this time around.

So looks like I'm down to $589.05

I'm not factoring in gift cards, coupons, or anything like that. I'm purely counting money out of MY pocket!

A Long and Winding Road...

December is a difficult month when it comes to consumption- or rather, over consumption.

I find that I need to constantly remind myself that new purchases aren't necessary.

A lot of people take advantage of the holiday sales to make new purchases. Sometimes, these are long sought-after items. It's easy to compare your journey to somebody else's. DON'T.

The choices other people make are not your choices.

Just because it's right for somebody else doesn't mean it's right for you.

It's easier said than done, I know.

I see other people buying all the new releases and I'm jealous. I see some content creators I love receiving PR and I'm jealous. I admit that openly. It's not that I'm not happy for other people, but it's wanting what they have. And why?

I'll also admit to struggling recently with my definition of success as it comes to social media. I was absent for a good portion of the year (2019) and now that I've been making an effort to post regularly again I see a decrease in numbers each time. It's disheartening because I don't know what I did wrong, if anything.

Perhaps people are just growing in different ways.

I'm trying to focus less on the numbers in all areas of my life. But unfortunately with a no buy and a beauty budget, that's simply not possible.

I have to track everything- every single cent.

And I'm trying not to be overwhelmed. But sometimes it feels like I'm a browser with too many tabs open. And where is that music coming from?

 If you have any advice please share!

XOXO

ELLE

Returning to the Blog-o-sphere!

Hello everyone!

I don't know if anyone will find their way to my blog after the long period of inactivity, but I thought I would start updating again.

My intentions right now are to treat this more like a diary (or a LiveJournal) and just keep track of my thoughts about spending.

I've tried and failed to budget in the past. And now I have no choice. I have to be firm with my money because I don't have anywhere close to the income that I did in the past.

Right now, the biggest struggle is passing the time.

So much of my entertainment was shopping or making lists of what I would purchase next. I was never happy with what I had.

I know part of that is because of my personal life problems. I was shopping to feel better, even temporarily.

But I am in a better place now. I am happier. And because of that I feel like I can handle having less.

For some people, admitting their financial woes can feel shameful. And I do wrestle with that at times because I feel like I should feel bad or like a failure. But this is life. Hopefully someday I will be more secure. But until then I have to try and save money wherever possible.

And little new makeup is a big part of that.

So here's hoping 2020 will be a successful year!

XOXO

ELLE

Thoughts on Purchasing and Panning

Hello friends!

I feel terrible that I don't use this blog as much as I should.

I've been posting more on my Instagram recently, and it's been an enlightening way to look at my makeup stash. I don't like calling it a collection, because then it sounds like something I'm building upon when in reality I'm trying to get rid of or use products up.

Showcasing products new and old has helped me feel inspired.

I'm not an expert photographer, but I'm learning. And I'm learning to be okay with not having all the newest things.

Don't get me wrong, I love makeup. Right now, at this point in my life, if I could have any job in the world it would be in the beauty industry. Something that allowed me to play with makeup.

But that's not the case. And I don't have the financial ability to keep buying. I'm the mother of a 15-month old boy, for one. A homeowner, for two. Life is expensive. And luxuries are not always something I can indulge in. Although, I have been. And I know it needs to stop. Seeing the bills add up is quite the reality check.

So I'm making due. I'm working with what I have. And I'm more motivated than ever to pan. I want to finish things up that I don't love so I can move them out. Too much clutter weighs me down. It's hard to find inspiration when you're staring at a box full of more than 200 lipsticks. And many that look vaguely the same.

I want to work on improving my skills- from makeup application, to photography, to video editing. And I don't need the newest products to do that.

So my Instagram and my YouTube channel, and yes, this blog, won't showcase the newest shiny things it will showcase my hard work and determination. The newest highlighter won't be seen on my feed, but I will shine a light on my focus. You won't see new eyeliners or blushes. No new creams, powders, or liquids. But maybe you will find some inspiration. Maybe you will find the desire to shop your own stash instead of shopping the shelves at Sephora or Wal*Mart. And maybe, just maybe, you will start your own makeup rehabilitation journey.

So what do you say? Are you with me?

XOXO

Elle